Self care used to feel selfish to me. I thought it meant putting myself above everyone else. Turns out, it was the only way I could truly show up for others.
For a long time, I put myself last. I thought resting meant I was lazy. I believed taking a break was weak. Not until I realized I was exhausted, overwhelmed, and constantly on edge.
Always working so hard, waking up very early in the morning, and sleeping late at night. That’s when I started asking myself: What if taking care of me wasn’t selfish, but necessary?
So I started small. One habit. Step by step, things started to feel lighter. Life didn’t slow down, but I did. And that made all the difference.
Why Taking Care of Yourself Isn’t a Luxury
I used to brush off the idea of taking care of myself. If I wasn’t working, I felt like I was wasting time. Not until one morning, I couldn’t even get out of bed. My body was drained. My mind felt foggy. That’s when I knew something had to change. From that day, I vowed not to overwork and to always take care of my body.
I realized something simple: if I didn’t take care of myself, no one would. Not because they didn’t care, but because they couldn’t do it for me. It wasn’t about bubble baths. It was about listening to my body and giving it what it needed.
Self care doesn’t have to be a full day at the spa. Sometimes it’s the simple things like washing your hair, going to bed early, or saying no to things that drain you.
Real care starts small and looks different for everyone. You don’t have to copy someone’s self care routine, do the things that make you feel good and relaxed.
What I Keep in My Self-Care Kit
I have created a small corner in my bedroom just for me. A few candles. A soft blanket. A little notebook that I use to dump my thoughts. These aren’t expensive things, but they matter.
Here are a few simple things I always keep nearby:
- Lavender oil to help me wind down
- A playlist with my favorite music.
- A thick journal
- A small mirror reminder that says “Be kind to yourself”
- My softest socks
This is my favorite corner whenever I feel overwhelmed from the day’s work, I run there, and honestly, it works.
Morning Habits That Changed Everything
My mornings used to feel rushed. I would wake up late and do everything in a rush. I never had time to appreciate myself and do small things that really matter.
Now, I take 30 minutes before I look at my phone. I breathe. I sip warm water. I stretch my arms. I open the window and just stand there. That small moment feels like magic. I do one thing that feels good, like lighting a candle or putting on calming music. This sets the tone for the rest of my day.
Here’s what I do in the morning
- Wake up without grabbing the phone
- Sip water with lemon
- Do three long stretches
- Light a candle or play gentle music
- Set one tiny goal for the day—nothing big
Aesthetics That Soothe the Mind
There’s something about surrounding yourself with softness. I’m drawn to earthy colors, clean spaces, and warm lighting. These little touches make my space feel safe.
Self care aesthetics aren’t about how things look to others, it’s about how they make you feel. Unlike before, when these things never mattered, I changed my bedsheets to softer tones. I swapped my lighting to warmer bulbs. I added a small plant by the window.
Self care aesthetics aren’t about impressing anyone. It’s about creating a space where your body can breathe more easily.
Try simple changes:
- Warm lighting instead of harsh overhead bulbs
- Playing instrumental music in the background instead of the news
- Using natural scents like eucalyptus or vanilla
Real Self-Care Doesn’t Always Look Cute
Self care care isnt always about bubble baths and lighting candles. Sometimes self care is crying in the shower or unfollowing people who make you feel unappreciated. Self care sometimes means letting the tears come. Letting the call go to voicemail. Letting the dishes wait. Sometimes it’s hard and messy. But it’s still care.
The day I turned off my ever-buzzing notifications and let a text sit unread without guilt, I felt lighter. I didn’t owe anyone constant access to me or apologies. That was real freedom.
Some real acts of personal improvement:
- Saying no, even if it disappoints someone
- Logging out of social media when it gets too loud
- Admitting you’re tired and resting without guilt
What I Learned From Doing Less
Saying no to everything. Skipping calls. Turning off all noise. Sitting under my blanket and just staring at the wall. They may seem like small things, but they can make a huge difference.
One evening, I skipped my to-do list and made hot chocolate instead. I didn’t “accomplish” anything, but I felt better. Sometimes doing less means getting more of your peace back.
You don’t need to wait for a breakdown to start taking care of yourself. Start small. Add just one thing to your self care routine. Then see how it feels. You’ll start to notice a shift, not in the world, but in how you carry it.
Closing
I used to think I had to earn rest. Now, I see rest as part of the work. And the more I care for myself, the more I can care for others without losing pieces of me in the process. If no one has told you this lately, you’re allowed to pause, to slow down, and to heal at your own pace. That’s not selfish. That’s love.
